Casper’s Top Five Hottest-Sounding Craigslist Women

We know, we know. You don't check the personals on Craigslist. You're too good for that, you don't need to meet people online, you don't wanna end up in somebody's basement, blah blah blah. But hey, it's just us here. You can tell us. You've checked the Craigslist personals before. It's ok! So have we. And we like what we found,  so here are the top 5 hottest-sounding women we've found on Craigslist.

#5 Looking for Friends And More Maybe!

"I am looking for friends with benefits or ltr with the right person. I am somewhat picky as most people are. I dont like toothpicks but I dont like very overweight either. I am I above average weight wise and like someone close to the same. Please also be close to six foot or taller and be able to hold a conversation. If you are just looking to get your rocks off.or are in a relationship no need to respond. Change the title your favorite.song for a response. Also, please be between ages 25 to 35."

Ok, this girl had us at 'looking for friends with benefits.' We're not quite what 'above average weight wise' means though. Does it just mean she thinks her weight is better than most people? Who knows. We also like that she said 'get your rocks' off and is not a homewrecker.

#4 Hope This Works...

"I don't know how well this is gonna work but never doubt something without giving it a chance first. So for starters I am a 20yr old, dirty blonde, blue eyed, 5'11", average weight woman. I think that my true beauty lies within but I'm not bad looking at the same time. I am gonna be honest, I have a bad immune system so I can't keep jobs very long. I live alone and I hate it. I want to find that one guy out there that wants me to stay at home and do the cooking and cleaning (without calling me a gold digger) but will bring home the money. I want a guy who wants children and I'm not against being with a guy who has children. I am looking for the one, not a one night stand but a man for the long run. If you think you fit this then reply to the post with True Man in the subject line, so I know that you are real."

Ok, honestly  we just like this girl because she said she'll cook and clean.

#3 I Need A Hot Hung Guy To Get Together With

"I am a 27 yr old woman with an insatiable sex drive. 5'8" 135 brn/grn and a good body. Totally shaved. I love to get [screwed] - 2 guys at once would be nice but in the meantime...I would love a guy who is in shape, under 40, hung 7 or more and stable. If this sounds like you then send me a message. I will only reply to messages with your stats and pictures - no texts until we work this out. Please put "horny guy" in the subject so I know you are real."

I mean, what more needs to be said. She's 27 and has an insatiable sex drive. Who cares if  she probably has more diseases than a clinic in Mexico? We are afraid that if she's expecting us to come even close to her "7" limit, she's going to be greatly disappointed.

#2 Looking For 1x Wild Sex, BF To Watch

"Looking to have sex with another woman while my boyfriend watches. No touching on his part at all. I am 5'3 athletic blond. Discretion is a must. Must be disease free, strap on welcome... Not looking for butch..."

Um,  ok is this the best girlfriend in the world? Yes.  Yes she is. She's also responsible, if not picky. But hey, beggars for crazy wild sex with two hot chicks can't be choosers, right?

#1 Looking For A Sexy Bi Girl For Man And I

"Looking for a sexy bi girl for man and i to call ours or a sexy girl for me without him knowing email me if interested! I'm looking for a gorgeous slim young lady amazing personality very outgoing and fun to be around and who isn't afraid to communicate or express her feelings."

This girl is like the last one, except she sounds hotter. And we like that maybe if she feels naughty she'll keep the other girl a secret. She says she's 'looking for a gorgeous slim young lady amazing personality very outgoing and fun to be around and who isn't afraid to communicate or express her feelings.' Welcome to the club sweetheart, so are we.

So, those were Casper's Top 5 Hottest Sounding Craigslist Women. Granted, people always try to sound hot on Craigslist. In our ad, we said that we have the face of Gerard Butler and the abs of Jesus. Actually, it's more like the face of Carrot Top and the abs of your Uncle Leroy, but that's the magic of the internet children.