Ted Nugent: I Never Sh-t My Pants to Avoid the Draft or Adopted My 17-Year-Old Girlfriend
Ted Nugent was recently a guest on The Joe Rogan Experience podcast, chatting about topics like gun control, immigration, hunting and much more. The most surprising moments, however, came at the end of the three-and-a-half hour interview, where Nugent denied two often-repeated stories: one, that he soiled his pants to avoid the Vietnam draft and the other, that he once became the legal guardian of his then 17-year-old girlfriend.
Both stories have tailed Nugent throughout his career. The Vietnam story comes from a 1977 interview in High Times magazine, where Nugent stated, “A week before [reporting for my physical exam], I stopped going to the bathroom. I did it in my pants. Poop, piss the whole shot. My pants got crusted up … Then they made everybody take off their pants, and I did, and this sergeant says, ‘Oh my God, put those back on! You fucking swine you!’ Then they had a urine test and I couldn’t piss, but my poop was just like ooze, man, so I poop in the cup and put it on the counter. I had poop on my hand and my arm. The guy almost puked. I was so proud.”
In the 1977 interview, Nugent claimed he got a 4-F back from the military, which classifies someone as “not acceptable for service in the Armed Forces” due to medical, dental or other physical reasons.
While talking to Rogan, though, Nugent claims he made the whole story up to screw with the people at High Times.
“Wikipedia claims I got a 4-F,” says Nugent. “4-F?! 4-F means you’re physically incapable. I’ve never been physically incapable of anything! They make this shit up. I made up the story for High Times magazine, you know, the great magazine of good information. Then it turned out that my drummer, KJ Knight - he’s actually admitted this and testified - that that’s what he did. We thought it was funnier than hell.”
Though Nugent’s poop story has never been properly verified, Snopes did some digging and found that the military did, in fact, give him a 4-F. Nugent got a high school student deferment (1-S) in 1967 and a college student deferment (2-S) in 1968. After being reclassified for military service (1-A) in 1969, Nugent was rejected as a result of a physical examination (1-Y) in 1969 and ultimately given a 4-F classification, although the records don't show why he received the 4-F.
The Reno Gazette Journal’s ‘Fact Checker’ confirms government records show a 4-F designation for Nugent and The Smoking Gun actually published Nugent’s military record, showing a 4-F classification as of December 15, 1972.
“The Ted-hating liberal press started quoting the High Times magazine and quoting an ex-girlfriend who claimed that I adopted her. I adopted my girlfriend?! Have you read that one? What the fuck?! … Absolutely absurd. I didn’t adopt anybody.”
The former girlfriend in question is Pele Massa, who was 17 years old at the time that the 30-year-old Nugent allegedly became her legal guardian. In VH1’s Behind the Music episode on Ted Nugent, Massa said, “I was underage and even back in the wild ‘70s, it wasn’t a terribly appropriate situation in most people’s eyes and now it would be criminal.” During that time, the age of consent was 14 in Hawaii, 16 in Nugent’s native Michigan, but 18 in many U.S. states.
The Behind the Music narrator states, “Ted admits to a number of liaisons with underage girls, and while it may have raised eyebrows, it never raised the interest of local authorities … [Pelle’s] mother signed papers making Ted her legal guardian.”
“I got the stamp of approval of their parents,” Nugent revealed in the VH1 special. “Because they figured better Ted Nugent than some drug infested punk in high school.”
Check out Ted Nugent’s appearance on The Joe Rogan Experience in the clip above.
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