Anton Purisima feels he has been unjustly harmed by a great many people, and he would like some compensation. A LOT of compensation.

Purisima filed a lawsuit in federal court against New York City, LaGuardia Airport, KMart, Au Bon Pain and more for a litany of reasons:

Civil rights violations, personal injury, discrimination on national origin, retaliation, harassment, fraud, attempted murder, intentional infliction of emotional distress, and conspiracy to defraud. $2,000 decillion ($2,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000).

That's a 2 followed by 36 zeroes, also called 2 undecillion. That amount of money, XKCD tells us, is way, way, way more than "the estimated economic value of all goods and services produced by humanity since we first evolved."

That minor tidbit doesn't seem to bother Purisima, unlike everything else that happens to people every day. Some of the events he claims have happened to him that require such astronomically large sums of money include someone's dog biting him on the finger and being photographed by a Chinese couple without his permission—you know, the kind of things that add up, eventually, to more money than has ever been created or ever will be.

Purisima says that the things that happened to him "cannot be repaired by money [and are] therefore priceless." Which is kind strange, considering he took the time to correctly identify an extremely obscure term for the precise amount of money he wants. Seriously, had you ever heard of the term "decillion" before today? Our spellchecking program doesn't even think it's a real word.

Though, as Lowering the Bar points out, it would be much more fun to refer to the amount in the suit as "two octillion gigadollars." Heh. Say that out loud, it's fun.

And in a final, unsurprising note, Purisima will be representing himself in this case. As the saying goes, the man who represents himself has a fool for a client—perhaps never truer than now.

 

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